On the Cusp of Change

Yesterday was Josh's birthday.  So when I got home from practice, we went out to eat at a favorite restaurant of ours.  As we sat there, (after 8 pm) we had the place to ourselves and were able to just talk.  The primary topic of conversation was what to name our little bean.  As we discussed names we liked and gave our reasons for vetoing the names we weren't fond of, I was struck by how much our world will change this fall.  It was such a neat moment to savor, to enjoy the fact that after this fall, we won't dream about the child we will have (until the next little one, but we'll already have one at home at that point).  After this fall it will be different.  If we are out to dinner alone we'll probably discuss our child at some point in the conversation and we'll go pick them up after we are done with our date.

This savory moment made me thankful for two reasons.  1. We've had 5 years of marriage together prior to having children.  We've had so much fun in our 5 years and have had great opportunities to lay a firm foundation for our future family.  We just enjoy each other and things don't get overly complicated in our relationship.  I'm married to my best friend.  2. I was thankful to be able to look to the fall and think about WHEN we have our baby, not IF we have our baby.  I know that in this life there are no guarantees but it was so freeing to be able to trust and hope in that moment that we will be able to meet this baby and bring them home this fall.  This was probably the first moment that I was able to think about my little one and say when not if.

Here's to a week that started out with trusting God and letting go of my fears and apprehensions.  I'm excited to see where it takes me.